Am I showing up for my life?
BY GUEST THINKER: BLAIRE MORRISS ::
No one wants to think they are sleepwalking. No one wants to be on autopilot.
In our society we tend to assume that if we are striving, then we are awake. We all have voices in our heads that tell us we need to be more, do more—to the point that it’s almost overwhelming. At times, I have completely shut down out of a perceived need to fix myself. Years ago my dear friend Susan shared with me an insight that she had. “It’s not about what you do, it’s about how you show up.” At the time, I loved the idea cognitively, but couldn’t quite grasp it on a cellular level.
All that changed when three years ago, I encountered one of my toughest challenges. While holding the suffering that each day brought, I began to learn how to show up for myself with kindness. And because I have been doing that work within myself, it has extended out to those around me. For me, showing up isn’t about what I do externally. It’s about how I show up in each moment. If my kids come into the kitchen while I’m cooking, do I stop and make eye contact or talk to them while I’m not looking at them? It’s not perfect, but at least the voice is there now, encouraging me to show up.
How do we reconfigure the voices in our heads? How do we teach them to ask of us not to do or be more but to show up more fully? It’s ultimately about choice. It’s about the choice to be vulnerable when I can, even when it’s really uncomfortable. It’s about the choice to be appreciative of myself for all that I’ve done today and over the past ten years. It’s about showing up enough to witness the thoughts so they don’t run the show.
Showing up is an ongoing practice of, and movement toward, self-love. I think of self-love as holding myself with the tenderness that I would hold my child. When I can hold myself with tenderness, I can show up for my life. And when I can show up for my life, I can hold myself with tenderness. The two ultimately become one.
About our guest: A Nurse Practitioner specializing in Integrative Medicine and a Certified Aromatherapist with over 18 years of clinical experience, Blaire Morriss is the owner of the Nashville-based aromatic apothecary, The Oil Jar. She is passionate about providing certified organic, ethically farmed or wildcrafted essential oils and empowering others with the knowledge of how to use them. To learn more, visit her at www.theoiljar.com.